In case anyone needs a summary of the book, here it is: Barbra is perfect. Barbra is a goddess. Barbra is WHITE HOT. However, Barbra is misunderstood and everybody else is to blame for it - especially her horrible cunt of a mother, who refused to tell her that she was a perfect, white hot goddess... Oh my God, that evil bitch! That is why poor little Barbra was like Cinderella, crying herself to sleep by the fireplace! BOOHOO!!!!! Her father would have adored her as she deserves, but sadly he died. Still, she's still his favorite and he worships her as the goddess that she is, from the Afterlife.

Barbra suffered a little when she was a child, and that is THE GREATEST TRAGEDY OF ALL TIME. Now she has an underground mall were she has hoarded, among many other things, the many dolls that her mother couldn't afford to buy for her. Did I mention that Barbra suffered a little as a child, AND THAT IS A TRAGEDY? She's been a multimillionaire since her mid twenties, but she didn't always get EXACTLY what she wanted AND THAT IS A TRAGEDY!!!!

In 1969 Barbra wore a Chanel dress that had a train 7.15932 feet long,. It was made out of taffeta with a guipure overlay. It had exactly 2,344 sequins and two of them were not perfectly aligned. The dress was meant to be soft pink, but it somehow was 0.00621 whiter than pink on the chromatic scale. Barbra wore it during a concert that lasted 2 hours, 30 minutes, 12 seconds and 1475 microseconds. It was recorded and mastered by Who Gives A Fuck and it took him 25 minutes to get it right, because Barbra is PERFECT.

Are you still awake? Barbra is WHITE HOT. Barbra is a goddess. Barbra is perfect and all the guys want her. She is also the greatest actress of all time, but stupid audiences wanted her to sing, because they are misogynists...

Now, repeat all the previous paragraphs ad infinitum, in different contexts and concentrating on irrelevant minutiae while eschewing anything juicy that could potentially paint her in a negative light. You have the utter and complete waste of a book summarized in a few paragraphs. Now, go get a better book and stop wasting your time on that self-adoring, narcissistic old cow.