I've had it said by some people to me a few times, but only when they were being aggressive--really aggressive. I've heard "blahblah told me to tell my faggot friend to stop giving her dirty looks" from friends. Shit like that. Obviously I overhear people saying it constantly but the only thing that's been directed to me with any consistency is "queer", "stupid queer" etc. People will say shit ONLY after they've passed you if you're walking down the sidewalk; never to your face, or mine anyway.

If one of my friends says it in front of me about someone they've notice walking or driving by or whatnot "oh look at that faggot" then I'll say something to the equivalent of "oh stfu" so they won't do it again.

I was referred to as Batty Boy by some kid in the work place; never heard the term before, but it sounded so juvenile I just laughed. Again not to my face. I was told by a female coworker. The guy that was saying it was straight and kind of femme. They always are. I heard some temp worker say "who let the fags in?" when I walked through a production area once. I replied with "upper management did" and then returned to my office upstairs very visibly.

I don't care if gay men say it, because it's our word now. Just like the N-word belongs to black speakers. Also, if a gay man tries to use it as an insult, it doesn't work, because I know that he's a "faggot" too. I generally don't give a shit if lesbians say it either because they ACTUALLY know what it's like to be a gay person and have to deal with all of the legal and other ramifications of being gay just as we do. I highly doubt that most lesbians give a shit if gay men say "dyke". We know how to use them in non-aggressive manners.

School/Work are the worst... but that's probably because you have to spend a large percentage of your day there. White collar types are surprisingly worse than blue collar types.

This is going to sound horrible. But it becomes better as you age. But that's because you're not attracting as much attention to yourself as you did in your youth. Do I still think that all homophobes are attracted to men... no.

I think that it's either about a repressed attraction -- generally guys who are into girls but might get a hard-on once and a while for some guy, a Kinsey whatever-t-f or in the closet around asshole friends / peers -- or it's about the popularity contest and sounding like a cool bro or a manly man and lookin' good and shit.

Gay men and lesbians are also expected by everyone else to "allow" them to use those epithets.

Oh, and "cocksucker" is "faggot" for people who want to say faggot but don't want other people to hear them say it. I wouldn't say that if the only people that are labelled cocksucker are men. I'm pretty sure I've been called that before.

*eyeroll*

R15 : Someone wore that shirt to my high school -- around 20 years ago now ...[italic]JFC [/italic] -- and he was told to remove it.